Flotsam

Free will is an illusion. I have heard this, felt it minorly before and only considered the concept in theoretical basis. Now I complete get that control over your own life, is just as substantial as a vision of a fountain of chocolate milk in the middle of the Sahara.

Its not like I was foolish enough to resist change. I accept it as a constant, rather the only constant. But all references to a normal life to be torn asunder, for you to be just a wrecked piece of who you used to be and what your world used to be like, one fine day without a sound or ceremony.

Reality just unhinged for me. Suddenly there are no certainities, no answers, no basis of any judgement/decision be it sound or otherwise. No people, no ties, no feelings, nothing familiar.

Nothing to anchor on to the semblence of my erstwhile universe.

It happened naturally and without notice like a season change or ageing. 

Universe decided to shake me out of my comfortable and predictable little niche and plant me on crossroads again. To quote the cliche - "fate is not without a sense of irony".

More frustrated than sad at being given a riddle with absolutely no means to find a resolution, I am completely aware of the fact that its just as well. I have never given up anytime and dont believe in that at all. Just one more turn of the wheel that requires a test of my resilience and spirit of survival. 

Not my idea of how it should be but hey I am just a lazy human in a tiny speck of a larger universe...what do I know?

Bring it on, World. Defiance is infinitely more natural to me than surrender...

Rain