Disconnecting starts now...

Things I'll miss about living away from America:
1. Smug Jewish Comedians giving me the daily/weekly dosage of irony, sarcasm and intentionaly poorly veiled double entendre. Or in 2 words - Jon Stewart.
2. Icecream and Chocolate cake for breakfast with a side of seasoned fries.
3. My dream library - whatever books and dvds I want that can be picked up at the place and time convenient to me. For free. [Long live NYPL]
4. Black Coffee. The more the merrier.
5. Seasons- Fall, Spring, Winter.
6. Having a night life without unintentionally screaming- "I am an unmarried adult woman out after sundown. I'm asking for it! Do your very worst."
7. I am a clothes size small petite here.
8. Living my life entirely online. Watching my TV there.
9. Maggi being the staple food of the NRI. Add the soy sauce.
10. No one accuses you of being a "Peter" or a "Mary" when you are most fluent in english.
11. Comic Book stores with washed Aquaman Tees.
Aquaman being the lamest super hero in the entire known set of multiple universes.
12. Washing literally dirty linen in a public laundromat in full view of all strangers who choose to look your way. Yes, that is my underwear.
13. Celebrities cycle into you randomly when you are just trying to cross the street on the way to office. Or sit in the table next to your when you are out having lunch. FYI. I always meet celebrities in the airports on my India trips. 100% successful track record.
14. Usage of double negetives -"You ain't got nothin' " and double positives - "Yeah right!" in everyday talk.

...more to come...

Want to help me by adding to this?

disengaging slowly,

Rain

Luck and Love

It was Lent season, Fat Tuesday came before Ash Wednesday.
On Fat tuesday, there is a special cake made called the King Cake and figure of baby Jesus is put into the cake. Whoever uncovers the figure when they take a piece are supposed to have the luck for the year.
I cut into the whole cake (previously uncut) and in the very first piece saw the tiny plastic legs of the baby sticking out and therefore picked out the figure and am the owner of all luck for 2010.
This surprising show of luck comes in the (almost) heels of me winning the lucky draw at the Holiday Party in december 09 (I think of it as Christmas still).

This leads me to think on a bigger picture question. So far in my life, all my problems have been little and I have had zero short term/small sized luck.
Upside being that whenever there was potential for me to be in deep muck (about twice) I've had a miraclous smooth sailing when the way emerges out of nowhere (which I call good karma and grace of god) that everyone is happy with.
But now that I am sinking into pretty deep muck (best way to describe it without getting explicit) and do need a helping hand into all that is great and good, I am getting this small installments of luck which do make for immediate gratification but have no impact on the overall quality of my life.
That has me worried.

This is the oft heard puzzle/joke/question - if you had a choice between small payouts peppered more frequently through time (with an unstated addendum of you being left to your own devices for any crap that you might get subjected to) or substantial bonuses that come between larger periods of small difficulties (that are well within your limits of tolerance/being able to overcome it)
what would you rather pick?
It seems to greedy to expect to have both short term and long term luck, so we will leave that option out of the pick.

I passed get another made up day that causes a lot of unnecessary grief among my peers in this country with stereotypical company of my own self.
Let another few years go by and the stereotype would be for me to start collecting cats and treating them like people;I am a cat person (but also jell well with dogs, cattle, birds...other species) and proclivity to a conclusion that seems both foregone and dreadful is not pleasant to consider.
To amuse myself on this Hallmark (the company) day, I resorted to watching and reading like I do for the rest of the thankfully ordinary days.
Valentine's Day (the movie) was predictably bland and lifeless. My pattern for picking the one guy as a hawt one and him inevitably being a gay character...continues.
But on the reading front, happily, I am rediscovering my taste for poetry.
Due to my natural pull towards anything celt (I must have been scots-irish in some previous birth), I randomly started reading Robert Burns (To quote "Better off Ted"-Irish drink too much and write overly depressing poetry)a few weeks ago and felt great resonance to his take on life/love in "Thine am I, my faithful fair" (which I always remember wrongly as Thine I am)-
What is life when wanting Love?
Night without a morning:
Love's the cloudless summer sun,
Nature gay adorning.
In poetry, Love is always associated with sunshine and warmth and Depression (or sadness) with darkness and cold. Scientists have shown links between night owl teenagers (who I used to be before I became a night owl adult)who rise late and miss the sunshine being less effective and happy.
I guess either poets had a scientific observation or that its just common instinctive sense of what goes together.
But getting back to the quote above, I liked the imagery evoked. I am in no hurry to get back to Sylvia Plath (Daddy was dark!) because I would like to not get to that place (like ever).
My 'embrace the inner darkness' phase is gone or atleast waning so I don't want to encourage anything that will increase its potency. I mostly want it gone because the people I interact with (not at professional capacity) are clueless to deal with the likes of me in the full throes of delirious joy from acceptance of my inner demons.
Its predictably disturbing to them. I might as well go goth all the way for the kind of unease I inspire in them even in a faceless interface like a text chat.

My sis and poet/blogger sent me some Pablo Neruda poems yesterday. She is well versed in espaniol (writing, reading and speaking) and enjoys spanish language movies and songs.
I recently saw "Like Water For Chocolate" (subtitles!) and I didn't like it at all [interestingly, the lead made king cake in the movie]. Magical realism doesn't go well with me which is also why I was left with a bad taste in the mouth after completing "Mistress of spices".
Spanish literature seems strewn with that keyword ('magical realism'...not 'mistress' you dirty dirty thing you). I didn't like 'Love at the time of cholera' but did like 'One hundred years of solitude'. So I approach Neruda with the mindset(its unfair but I am a bad bad girl) that I will probably not find the resonance I feel when I read (say)"Passionate Shepard to his love".
I mean, C'mon - "Come live with me and be my love and all the pleasures we will prove." what beats that? [mind turns to mush and subject starts drooling]. That one hits the spot every time.
Ol Shakesy is pretty good too. I read his poem on Aphrodite called "Venus and Adonis" that interestingly gave a backstory to why love is also so much pain; she apparently curses after Adonis dies (foolishly, not heeding her words...[men!!!])-
'Since thou art dead, lo, here I prophesy:
Sorrow on love hereafter shall attend:
It shall be waited on with jealousy,
Find sweet beginning, but unsavoury end,
Ne'er settled equally, but high or low,
That all love's pleasure shall not match his woe.

'It shall be fickle, false and full of fraud,
Bud and be blasted in a breathing-while;
The bottom poison, and the top o'erstraw'd
With sweets that shall the truest sight beguile:
The strongest body shall it make most weak,
Strike the wise dumb and teach the fool to speak.

'It shall be sparing and too full of riot,
Teaching decrepit age to tread the measures;
The staring ruffian shall it keep in quiet,
Pluck down the rich, enrich the poor with treasures;
It shall be raging-mad and silly-mild,
Make the young old, the old become a child.

'It shall suspect where is no cause of fear;
It shall not fear where it should most mistrust;
It shall be merciful and too severe,
And most deceiving when it seems most just;
Perverse it shall be where it shows most toward,
Put fear to valour, courage to the coward.

'It shall be cause of war and dire events,
And set dissension 'twixt the son and sire;
Subject and servile to all discontents,
As dry combustious matter is to fire:
Sith in his prime Death doth my love destroy,
They that love best their loves shall not enjoy.'

How very true...huh? Pretty Awesome!!!
You'd think for someone who likes his work and who's thinking around the theme of V day, I would put in a good word for the seminal 'Romeo and Juliet'.
But fat chance my dear...I remember reading out passionate lines from that very play to Jay and B in the library, while all 3 of us were bubbling in mirth. Yes, we are the kind of people who laugh when Juliet looks at the dead body of her love and chides him for not leaving her any poison.
Judge away. Play was well written and everything, I just find young love comical; they were 15 yrs old for gods sake! at that age we were worried about school and exams...not comparing anyone to a freaking summer's day.The more intense or earnest they got, the more funny it was (is?) to us.
Think a line from Valentines Day sums it up best - Young Love...so impractical.
Back then, in school, my taste in poetry ran more into the intensely religious William Blake stuff and the other extreme...the very wonderful, light tone of Ogden Nash's poetic take on everything from going to the dentist to mosquitoes.

Coming back to the V theme, I am listening in a loop for weeks together to the song Cosmic Love by Florence and the Machine. It has very dark lyrics on the subject of feelings for a lover that attracts me-
"The Sun, The Moon, They have all been blown out
You've left me in the dark
No dawn, no day, I'm always in this twilight;
In the shadows of your heart."

and also - " So darkness I became"
Ladies, this is a must when you are trying to accept your rage against a one who is senselessly dropping laundry around the house (for you to pick up, presumably) when all you want to do is love him, having given up practically your entire life.
Guys, you will not like it. But if you do, let me know...you might be worth knowing (or going by my pattern - gay; but still worth knowing)

In all, I am thankful for the little luck, presence of love and support (regardless of lack of the cupidy, red colored, heart shaped kind) and the abundance of knowledge and creative art (learning & expressing) for me to feast on for the rest of my life.
These are my joys and I am truly grateful to have them.

Also On 23rd Feb...I went to the taping of the show that comes on night after night (yet not called the nightly show) and blurted inadvertently loud words of love to the host and he returned the words sweetly (and made up pretty much the entire 28 yrs that I have spent not saying anything romantic). Thankfully those are my lovely memories and were not shot on camera or broadcast.

I am definitely the lucky one :)
Rain

Pretender

Its that time of the year again when I announce my latest crush, although mid life is hardly an appropriate time for this, I am exceptional. Ta Da! The Pretender was a cool series that I used to watch when I was in middle school (very early teens) and immediately liked the premise and the leads enough to never have forgotten it.
Fast forward to a few years later (ok...quite a few) and Hulu was hosting the entire first season of this Show expiring by New year eve. So I did the marathon watching and it was a joy.

For one thing, Jarod (the hero, pretender, genius) suddenly struck me as being amazingly attractive in my rewatch. Surprise gave way to reason when I considered that I had had my puberty this time around and hence noticed.

Come 2010, Hulu put up season 2 and I was hooked all the way until the season finale. Then I couldn't bear to wait till Apr & Aug 2010 for seasons 3 & 4. I needed immediate gratification. So I plunged into research and found out that there were 2 movies out after season 4 (which had only raised more questions and wasn't a logical endpoint to the story).
Age and erosion of story line was apparent (as was bad hairstyling advice) in the 2 movies which I was able to get my hands on but I watched anyway until the 2nd movie (which came out in 2001) concluded with a LOTR/Matrix melange with Jarod as the Neo/One.
Sigh...great expectations crashed and burned.

But yes the end result is that, Michael T Weiss from 1994-2000 (when he was in early 30s) is my new crush (note how specific I am of which timeframe in the life of the guy I have a crush on) and a testimony to the shallowness of my character that I don't nearly encourage or feed enough.
As a result of the strong interest in this very hunky person (did I mention the deep bass voice, dimples accompanying smiles with eye crinkling and cheekbone and jaw structure of a superhero? No? How remiss of me!), I have watched a made for TV movie(Mary Higgins Clark's 'Remember Me' where he is not the hero),2 episodes of Justice League (voice of Etrigan/Jason Blood) and Disney's Tarzan & Jane (animated, voice of Tarzan). All in the last 18 hours.
I'm dreading 'Jeffrey',the movie I have ordered that is in transit to me, where he played the romantic lead of the protagonist after whom the movie was named (yes, its 'that' kind of movie).
Like a car crash, I dont like it but I can't look away. Also the DVD of a cheesy looking detective movie 'Written in blood' (he is the lead) is also expected any day now...I am gamely going to get through it despite the worst hairstyle of all time on an otherwise striking man.

Phew...lets have some substance after all that fluff, shall we?
I loved the titles to the science articles in today's papers (not the wrap your groceries kind of newspapers) -
Y chromosome not stagnating, men not idiots
As shameful as it may seem and being a self confessed quisling to my gender, I have to admit that the smartest people (offputting academic successes are not considered; just the cool ones) I have met and liked are predominantly male. So I didnt think there was never any danger of men being idiots.
One track minded (a track that is fated to disappear?), for sure, but not idiots.
Rather than stagnation, I was worried more about complete vanishing of the 2 sexes biology of human kind which is not discounted with the new discovery that Y chromosomes are rapidly evolving. Also, if they evolve too fast for us (the women) to parallel, we may even reach a point where men and women differentiate as a species; Which will bring us back to parthenogenesis as the only way to foster survival (so sad!)
No immediate danger, I think. But then, change is the only constant [I hate that phrase. HATE IT.]

Doomsday Clock to be reset 10am EST today
This wonderful device has been at 11.55 PM since 2007 (maybe even from cold war era) for fear of nuclear annihilation of the planet and they are resetting it to 10 AM. Rejoice, world. Me...I will live each day as if it were the last (by over eating and copious escapist media) because too many nations are "Nuclear" without sharing a responsible outlook.
The official survivor of 2 atom bombings died in japan last week and SNL joked that he coined the phrase - Oh no! Not Again. [ROTFL]
But its quite likely that in my lifetime I may have to survive some sort of inter continental, high heat war/attacks regardless of which part of the world I live in. Anti missile missiles are being announced by the nations of the world (our desh & China...which I guess means NKorea, Iran and Pak also to state the obvious) on an almost daily basis and I think...this is an infinite loop isnt it?
Some enterprising soul will definitely have thought of creating the Anti- Anti missile missiles and pretty soon we will be seeing the positive x axis increase of N plotting where N is the power to which Anti is repeated. So I say- Be Afraid. Be very afraid.
Make it 11.56 PM on the Doomsday clock, ye fools. Start kissing people goodbye as many times as you can (or shake hands...up to you)

Half A Million Bathe In India's Ganges
Kumbh Mela is here again and I am too far away to even get a sprinkle of the gangajal on me...its all Hudson all the way with me. Makara Sankranthi is upon us, my people. Happy Pongal.
Even otherwise I encourage everyone to bathe. Its a good practice that keep man from being an anti-social animal.

TGIF!
Rain

Memories of 15 years ago

I added Hulu to my blog's editable links as a nod to the great service it provides people like me (who's roommates will not split cable costs). Over the course of the better part of this year, it has given me access to the latest in must see TV(Jon Stewart & Colbert Report) and the rest of TV. Since the two greatest pundits are on Thanksgiving break, I had to dig into the archives for something else to occupy the time in between my sleeping breaks and found for myself, the full seasons of REMINGTON STEELE.

It took me back to a time when I was in my early teens and did things like free hand draw the skulls of all the primate ancestors for social science projects. I didn't have cable TV.

Apparently my Social Science teacher was impressed enough with my free hand drawing skills to ask us to make a larger version of the tree on which the skulls were arranged for the 25th year of school exhibition.

My school friend Varalakshmi asked me over and we had the very best time at her house having finished the project within the first hour or so (my free hand sketching skills peaked early apparently), we spent the rest of the day watching cable tv - M.A.S.H (love the oh so droll Hawkeye) and the Around the world in 80 days miniseries starring the same handsome man (said she) who was'Remington Steele'.

Pray tell, said I,what a Remington Steele is (I peaked early on Shakespeare based stage acting also). We also discovered a common passion for the Rat Pack, especially Ol Blue eyes Sinatra; now that I think about it, its extremely fascinating for a 13 year olds from madras of the early 90s to have that particular taste. But that is for another discussion.

I think I can still recall Vara's excited rendition of the premise behind the masterful plot of Remington Steele; the woman PI who for getting business in a man's world invented a Boss called (guess) and in walks this suave guy who answers to that very name. He is never able to solve the cases, Laura does all the work but he BSes (we didn't swear back then so I'm paraphrasing) his way out of the episode finales.

I hate smarmy, uppity creatures. Still do.

I sincerely mistrust anyone who's hair is perfectly brushed at all times.

Also feel violent dislike for anyone who smiles with lips pulled back at just one side.

Remington Steele was all these things and then some.

Nevertheless, it was great fun catching a blast from the past; especially since it ties with my memories of Vara. We've not met since end of school and I heard from unverified sources that she is married and with kid(s) in the states.

Hope you are having fun, Varalakshmi.

Rain

View from the top

I did it.

I finally moved and it just so happened, my room is at the last floor of a high rise.

I sit here and see blue skies and clouds outside my window. I see office from here.

Sure the getting the elevator and having it stop in each and every floor till there is no oxygen left is a huge test in the patience that I don't really have but I'm on top now.

As small as this room is, its entirely mine. That is just brilliant.

Still settling in,

Rain

First Desi Oscars

We knew it was a long time coming but the its finally here!

Such a red letter day my indian brothers  & sisters, my family and that one guy I will marry (when I find him) KUDOS :)

We're proud of you ARRahman (you are a music genius) and Pookutty (you're acceptance speech was A-W-E-S-O-M-E)

Our tricolor flies that much higher today and this is a special day for Mumbai, the eternal.

So HAPPY,

Rain

WE WON!!!!

PEOPLE...We finally have a gold medal!

Abhinav Bindra won the 10m Men's Air Rifle.
We saw the victory ceremony and we felt goosebumps when the proud anthem of India was played. This is a red-letter day and tomorrow we celebrate!!!

Here are some excerpts from the commentary-

The gold medalist with an outstanding score of 100.5 in the Final moving all the way up from starting in 4th place, Abhinav Bindra from India.
Bindra's final score was 104.5
Bindra lived at Colorado Springs for about 6 months several years ago and trained with the US team. He is a super kid and winning the gold medal couldn't have happened to a nicer Kid
Bindra's Final score of 104.5 was outstanding and carried him to the gold medal, even though he trailed by 2 points in the preliminary
Abhinav Bindra, India, who in the reigning World Champion, is now also the 2008 Gold Medalist. His final score is 700.5

HINDU ARTICLE


proudly Indian, JAI HIND!!!
Rain

Get Smart whether you know it or not

Two weekends have passed since I moved and I am still yet to spend both saturday-sunday nights at my new house. Last weekend was the American Independance Day long weekend and we were in a trip to Virginia and DC. Arunabh has already blogged about it but I am definitely going to have to suppliment that account with a post right here to ensure everyone's perspective is covered. Consider the above a trailer, if you will, for a soon to be released post. How about this past weekend, you may ask, so the story unfolds...


Yesterday was Aneesh's birthday and he is the baby of the group so I came from my new place, back to where I used to stay as the boys' neighbour until a forthnight ago, for his birthday celebration. And what a lovely celebration it was, consisting of Music, Dance, Violence, Comedy and some Romance (ever present if you put so many 23-28 yr olds together in a room). Some Comedy/Violence parts were even captured on tape and posted in a popular video site (courtesy Dinesh who seems to have a penchant for shooting people at their most unfortunate time - being beaten, getting ragged .etc.) I had a brilliant time and spent most of the night/early morning in hysterical fits of laughter.


Celebrations were planned to continue in the afternoon with 'Journey to the center of the Earth' [3D] but exactly 15 mins before the actual start of the showtime planned, it was found out that our friendly neighbourhood movie theatre only offered the 2D version thus draining the very reason why anyone would choose to go to the movie in the first place. By a curious twist of fate, we decided to go to the city to watch movie instead. Yuvaraj and the boys thought we were going to the city theatres to catch 'Journey..' in 3D while us girls were of the firm opinion that we were going to 'Jaane Tu Ya Jaane Naa'. Needless to say there was a bloodless coup ensuring that we ended up going for the latter, much to the chargin of a certain someone. Only, we were an hour and a half early for the next show!


This was highly disorienting for all of us since none of us had previously ever committed the faux paus of being over-early to anyplace. So we stood outside wondering how to kill time when someone said we should go to another movie if only to stay cool for the next hour and a half, so after a quick show of hands we voted to go in for 'Get Smart' and that was a serendiptously wonderful happening. Although he may be a part of the 'Frat Pack' (an astronomical no-no) I am a huge fan of Steve Carell. He simply cracks me up and comes across as a very intelligent, sweet and genuine guy in every character he plays (from The Office to Evan Almighty and to a very teeny-tiny extent 40yr old virgin) and Get Smart movie is such a feel good action comedy/ parody that it plays right into his strengths.



Anne Hathway is a nice surprise; otherwise known for her sugary sweet roles in Princess Diaries duology (is that what they call 2 movies in a series?) and Devil Wears Prada, she really makes you believe she is a badass field agent of C.O.N.T.R.O.L and her chemistry with a much older Steve Carell is really worth mentioning and definitely can't be missed. Rest of the cast also fit their roles so well that its a summer delight as the movie scampers at a brisk pace; a special shout out to Alan Arkin, The Rock and James Caan (a very funny President).
I may not have seen the serial that this movie is based on or the 60s original Get Smart movie but this movie is worth watching by itself (although some insider jokes may have been lost on me) and I sincerely hope the sequel (which are sure to follow) don't butcher all the positivity created here.


I was the last to leave the theatre of Get Smart as the rest were already in the one playing 'Jaane...' or in various stages of getting there. So the price I paid for watching Max Smart mini-harpoon himself yet again was the wonderful melody song that plays endlessly in my iPod this past week - 'Kabhi Kabhi, Aditi...'


When I breathlessly made it in, the young group in the movie were already graduating from college luckily that is when the story really picks up. So Aditi (from the eponymous song, aka Meow) and Jai (Singh Rathore or Rats) are really close among the group of 2 other boys and equal number of girls. As is true in most mixed groups there are mutliple love triangles- Rotlu has a one sided undeclared yet widely known feelings for Aditi (who along with jai is oblivous to it) and Bombs (Sandhya) has a crush on Jai (again...oblivious). And as a consequent resolution the two bond over their unrequited feeings. Jignesh (Jiggy) is a happy person who invites everyone to his own surprise birthday party, who's hair is a highlight (pun intended) and Shaleen is the cool guitar wielding punk dresser who sees what is going on all too clearly., i
The parents, in the film, are a bunch of excellent performancers from the best of yesteryear theatre and telly- Nasiruddin Shah keeps you in splits although he never even exceeds the confines of a frame, Ratna Pathak is the activist lawyer brainwashing her son into non-violence, Kitu Gidwani and Rajat Kapoor are the dark antithesis of the endearing couple of Jayanth Kriplani and Anuradha Patel (the beauty from Shilpa Kumkum covers!!!).
The young cast members have done neat jobs themselves. Good launch pad for the lead pair, aptly used by Imran, but I for one wasnt too impressed by Genelia, who according to my humble opinion has to work on her acting skills because cutie pie looks are transient.
The movie is refreshing, cute and many may connect with the storyline of friendship, how love seems to creep in somewhere unnoticed until its threatened by jealousy. Anyway, here is the spoiler - It ends on a happy note. [what a shocker!]

On the whole, a lovely entertainer with wholesome appeal to the whole family, another winner for Aamir Khan who already wowed yours truely with 'Taare Zameen Pe...' [which is in a whole different level of wonderful]


Doubly plied with feel-good so feeling good-good,
Rain

WALL-E

The most poignant love story that I have seen in a long while, funnily enough, is between Robots.
I write this post enraptured by Disney-Pixar's "Wall - E"

Its a familiar story- a common guy (robot) meets fleetingly with a very sophisticated girl (robot), way above his league and falls for her immediately. Introduces her to all aspects of his erstwhile lonely existence (earth is evacuated) with his pet (cockroach). She leaves after her work is done and he follows her to deep space [Ahhhhh..........]

Its simply not possible to find love between two beings, this cute and pure had there been humans in place of the gadgety protagonists; a certain sense of cynicism or sarcasm is bound to peek its head. Also the debate of how much does 'love' play a part in the selfless pursuit rather than ...ahem the physical attraction. Here you cant accuse robots of such nefarious ulterior motives.

On the not-so-cute side, this is also a story about how human consumption is going to cost us the earth. Its about taking charge of your home, working for what matters...Struggling to stay in control rather than birds in a gilded cage. Quite obviously, this animation movie is probably best absorbed in all its nuances by the kids inside of adults. And as one such, I recommend this movie.
Its practical in its dystopian prediction for the future but its still a feel-good movie, a very nice one too.

To review the technical effort behind this movie is not my cuppa, I simply don't have the qualification to say anything. However, animation wise, my most favorite parts are the flawless enmeshing of video footage & animation and space travel parts.

To sum up **********

Not your usual cartoon movie,
Rain

Four Days in Beach Paradise

The Bahamas trip started on a whim to act on dreams that some of us had, of traveling to a beautiful Caribbean island and forgetting normal life, even if it was only for a few days.
The time was May 2008 and the place was Nassau, the capital of the Republic of The Bahamas.

The experiences from those 4 days were so complex, myriad and colorful that I have taken it for granted that I will probably never be able to successfully capture them in my words. All I intend to do here is just put in a few markers to stimulate my memory for a later time so as to recapture the stories and happenings engraved in the secret language of my mind.

Admittedly, its not comfortable for me to extol my virtues or the heights of my feelings of achievement or joy. I don’t even like seeing many ‘I’s in any of the content written (which is probably wrong grammar too).
But in order to best capture the fact that it was me who went about doing these incredible things and seeing beautiful sights in this island that still retains its quaint and picturesque British Colonial flavor, I suppress this aspect of me, and narrate the highlights of my trip-

I smiled non-stop for 2 hours at the sheer familiarity of the land (which seemed a dead ringer for some coastal Indian town) when we landed in Nassau,
I lived in a room which let me gaze into the ocean when I opened my eyes in the morning,
I dove down the Caribbean (where the depth was 65,00 feet, just a trench after where we were) and swam with the Reef Sharks,
I kissed a bottle-nosed dolphin called Salvador who proceeded to show off his football skills,
I swam among the rainbows of fishes in the blue-green lagoon,
I lost $60 dollars in 2 magical nights at The Atlantis,
I jigged on the road side when the parade of drummers and dancers passed us by and they called us to join them.
I drank unbelievable amounts of saline water and still held on to my bearings,
I was stung by Jelly fish while I gazed at a sunken Cessna Airplane made famous in Jaws,
I shopped in straw market where bargaining was the way of life and realized how much I had un-learned it in my time at the US,
I took a self portrait snap, underwater, while snorkeling which was universally reviewed as ‘scary’ among orkut friends,
I felt gratified when the local people called me ‘Pretty Girl’ in their oh-so-exotic lilting Caribbean English,
I ate every lunch in a Thai place which was the solitary source of quality vegetarian food, I played the demure damsel protected by the boys, on the night about town, when we were the only non-locals in Arawak Cay,
I splashed around with my friends in the hotel pool and was unsuccessful in teaching a certain person to swim (to his satisfaction),
I had my photograph taken swinging on a street lamp a-la ‘Singin in the Rain’,
I saw in my minds eye how clearly two people in love just seemed to ‘belong’,
I noted to my surprise that I didn’t mind 4 days without cell phone and internet,
I was happy to jump off the boat into the welcoming waters like a small uninhibited child,
I bought rum cake that Bahamas is famous for (Bacardi factory is situated in Nassau)

All this and a thousand more lovely moments- all of which I remember, most of which I have not documented, forms My Vacation to the Bahamas (a lovely addition to my passport entries). I thank the four other co-travelers for making this very special time so much more wonderful than I had ever hoped. The Bahamas is one place I would definitely revisit in a heartbeat; having said that its only fair to also point that some of us made a pact that when we come back for trip#2 we would be able to live in Atlantis resort (Which has to be seen to be believed)

Travel is the best education and I hope to be a world scholar in that way J

To this world, and beyond!
Rain

Newfound Narcissism

Its official...I have put on back whatever weight I had lost, in just 2 weeks of lapsed time.
Nevertheless, the confidence in my looks that I had gotten for the first time, thanks largely to an excellent portrait photo by a friend in law, hasnt waned yet.

Today I had the good fortune to have yet another passably good portrait photo of me taken when I was least expecting it. I was just in my friends' to pick them up on our way to Valabha Ganapati Temple when I walked in on a full-fledged photoshoot and they were kind enough to include me in the last 3 shots. Although, I have firmly become the mayor of AuntyLand, I saw bits of my mother in my photos today and that made me happier about my appearance than I can remember being. She is a handsome woman. If I had more of her in me, I'd be very sought after!

Anyway, one more official news - I like how I look.
May not be earthshaking to most, but its quite significant that one should feel good about themselves. Even most transitory and materialistic parameter like how you look matters to your self image. Your self image in turn matters to your attitude, personality, confidence, how you present yourself to others and ultimately how others will see you. No new findings here, just that I am able to actually accept the stuff I have been just reading about for so long.

Now that I have moved to the pro-marriage camp (not that I was expressly against it at any time, just that I didnt want me married) its quite important that the looks factor and all the psychological issues behind it are sorted out ASAP (hate that word still, yes). I have been asked to make peace with the fact that potential grooms have only my grainy pictures to make up their minds for the first level of showing 'interest' (provided the horoscope, profile, age, vital statistics .etc. are all matching...which is a blooming miracle of probability).

Even if not with the intention of making me more nubile, I hope to atleast convert the new joy of me into wearing uncreased clothes to work and brushing my hair when I go out.

A Model Me,
Rain

A Holi day!

It probably wouldn't be very far fetched if I were to state that I practically live in India. The demography of the locality of my residence is such that humans of other races are a rarity. I guess there are more firangs in some part of Bangalore [say] than this place!

Today dawned like any other saturday [and here I stop about my rising habits] and my wonderful friends decided at 2 that we are leaving at 3 to go to the New York International Auto Show [how typical really...Men!]. Then at 3.20, I was still at my house looking for something to hold up my recently loose pants [by way of my circumference reducing....Thanks to hectic project!] and made a frantic call to my girl pal who was also coming to ask if I can borrow hers when she informed me that there are people in the corridor waiting to ambush any desi that crosses the vicinity and that she was lulled into opening up the door by one of the guys in our gang [or "The Family" as its being called now on account of the supposed pairings that are rumored to exist]. Next thing she knew, she was colored bright pink by 10 strangers and one grinning turncoat, who she assumed was there to get her since we are going out.

Having listened to this moving story of triumph of human spirit ['Yaam petra sugam, peruga iv vaiyagam' - Let the joy I got be propagated to the rest of the universe], I still reiterated the importance of holding up of my pants for the rest of the day and she agreed to come over.
As I opened the door for her, she told me that "the people" were "attacking" the apt of the guys.

Naturally, I had to look in that direction! [As if anyone could have ever not looked]
Unsurprisingly, I was immediately spotted by the Holi Gang for the crime of still sporting my skin color and they made a turn to my house.
I pulled my friend in with my lightening quick, superhero reflexes and turned the lock of the door with almost suave yet rapid moves before the fastest of the predatory gang could even bring a toe into my threshold. Then I proceeded to calmly announce to the guests of my roommate about the dangers lurking outside, jerking them off from the comfortable states of relaxation that they were indulging in, in our living room. Meanwhile, outside there was a curious silence after some rapid shuffling of footsteps and I posed the question of whether anyone was outside [to no one in particular]...pat came a reply of my other friend from the other side of the firmly locked door [one of the guys who was 'attacked']
"They are here", he said [Poltergeist theme music plays].

Immediately there were thundering knocks that broke the spell of uneasy silence which had settled by then. Indistinct cries were heard which I assumed were encouraging me to open the door and introduce some color into my house and my rather terrified guests. I yelled to my unseen door knockers and asked them to not proceed with their plans as I had guests; an attempt which even I knew was nothing more than a grand gesture [Like when Moses marched up to a mighty Pharaoh and said - Let my people GO!...except, not as great as that]

Then, at that very nick between consecutive subdivisions of time, I knew what needed to be done. I marched out and firmly locked the door behind me. My state of readiness to go out be damned!
"Happy Holi" I said to the lively enthusiastic group of my countrymen [and I include women here] and they greeted me with a non-uniform and out of sync version of the same celebratory wish and proceed to turn me green and yellow. They were also kind enough to have me partake the Holi sweets and made my day even more wonderful!


Happy Holi, all...Spring is Welcome regardless of the name of the actual festival.
Go out and hug your neighbour, develop that feeling of community and make someone's day!

cannot take an Indian out of India ;)
Rain

Awake...at last!

This blog post is dedicated to me.
Its addressed to me by myself and I will probably be the only person to read it also.

Funnily enough, sounds like I may have developed God Complex erstwhile known to affect only Cardiac and NeuroSurgeons [the alphas of medicine jungle], but its an outcry from an isolated padded cell I have created for my own expression [and I am not talking about the facial variety here]

Didn't I love to write? Wasn't I that exuberant person who was vocal with joy and sadness at equal measure? What happened that turned me completely around?

Can't figure out for the life of me. Just like Forrest Gump started running one fine day all the way until he suddenly decided to stop, I just didn't write for very very long and now have decided to break that. Just as good, at least I have taken baby steps away from the well I have been croaking in for the past years...

I will probably not make any money from this even if I were to add google adsense simply because I am not as good-as others, as I used to be, as required for making money with blogs in adsense...fill any option. What the heck, go crazy fill all the options...they fit anyway.
wait, there is more - I don't write about anything that google adsense can take keywords out of, because its all about ME and I am in no way connected with any commerce that can sell.
Yet I want to start writing again, rusty and degenerated as the posts maybe, I will start flexing my stiff muscles of creativity or expression. I should get good eventually, odds are good for regular practice to cause some improvements.

I feel an awakening today, to break out from the monotony of my mundane life; to get better, to be happy and not numb. I WANT ADRENALINE, ENDORPHINS - something...
I want a sensory load of new sights, sounds and experience...I want to KNOW, LEARN and UNDeRSTAND. I am clean slate waiting to be etched on...I am Joe's beginner enthusiasm...

Consciously want to avoid channelling Joe from Fight Club into my soul; its becoming disturbingly easy to connect with a drone who turns into a sociopath.
Valmiki would be the ideal...the primitive hunter who turns into an erudite sage and composes a masterpiece that survives the ages.

I could do with a surge of electricity to switch on my brain circuitry...Someone provide a boost!
Life is so transitory, I want to be alive for every moment of it...to savor all of its flavors and not stay boring and bland. Inactivity begone!

I WANT TO FLY, I WANT TO FEEL.
HELLO WIDE WORLD, SHOW ME YOUR WONDERS...

Re-started,
Rain

Tale of the Two Cities

I am a super-charged NewYorker during the workweek daytime and a change back to a mild mannered Jersey Girl at other times. I embrace my dual identities and happily too.
Funnily enough, it fits and isnt as contrary as one might expect. Having managed the transition from small-town girl (where everyone on the street practically knows your name and what you had for breakfast) without even blinking, I smoothly enmeshed myself into the routine that best serves the fact that I work in New York and live in the neighbouring Garden state.
Of course, I had help; Vijay to help with the office related settling-in and Ratheesh helped me find my groove in the svelte sophistication of Newport, Jersey City.

I never thought I would feel this way, but I like the bee-hive activity in the Big Apple and the constant buzz of people doing things. I like submerging into the sea of humanity and being led into and out of trains and while crossing the streets. There is simply no time for gossip and nose-poking here, its just not NY.
Rules here are simple and very primeval - "Keep Going or Get out of the way". This penchant for efficiency and productive non-intrusive outlook hasnt taken away the souls of the populace, if at all the vibrant culture and flourishing art, architecture, music and theatre are any parameters to go by.

Although treated with apparent disdain by the "natives", the vibes in Jersey City are by no means rural or pastoral as the polished cousins across the Hudson would like us to believe. Although its true that NJ is practically majority Indian with a smattering of the other nationalities, the people are smart, glamorous and ubercool too. If you arent up to going beserk in the 7th Avenue shops (after looking at pricetags) or find it ok to breeze in and out of Millenium Hilton (having eaten and paying the bill there) then Jersey City is probably slumming. But I am in the median of the population's per capita income and I like the close-to-home feel of Jersey and am looking forward to shopping in the 'Indian' street in Journal Square, eating at the Indian eateries in Edison, going to the Temple in Bridgewater and visiting Brinda in the family suburb of Brunswick.

An element of surreality is the place where I live, its a luxury furnished apartment in a high-rise and it overlooks the Newport Marina (where the rich people park their yachts), the Hudson river and the eternal lights of the Manhattan skyline. I have a doorman with a reception desk (replete with the uniform and the gold buttons) and my lobby looks like something from a Karan Johar movie set. To make things worse, I practically occupy the whole house by myself and have gotten even more spoiled with my idea of "space".

Independance and Freedom is in every atom here - you cook if you want or go out and eat, you stay in if you want or go jogging at 1 AM on the Hudson walkway, you save-up if you can or go shopping at the Newport Mall, you can drive or walk where ever or take a train to anyplace, you can internalize all you want and no one will bother you or you could surround yourself with people and be out all the time; Its your choice and there are no constraints here [except those of the financial kind, which we will not focus on just to keep our sanity].

In short, I am living it and loving it- the Desi take on the American Dream.

Happy at last,
Rain

A Twist in the tale...

Was it the gemstone earrings sent with a special dash of my parents' blessing? Was it that Saturn moved away from the house of my sign? Was it just that there was an opportunity and my current team thought me expendable? Who knows or cares?
All that needs to be highlighted is that I have just completed my last day with a project I was involved in for the better part of my entire career and am moving on to a new Project, new role in a new team in a new location. If that wasn't enough of a twist in the story, I went to the Bryan Adams concert on a totally wet night and simply because we turned up, our lawn tickets were upgraded to the enclosure ones!
One blemish on the exuberance of the entire evening was my flare up with Gow [Who decided to be behave like a complete *&*%@#$&*#@% without any reason]. Some good friendships die this way...
With a fresh new start to life, I decided to revamp my wardrobe with clothes selected by people with some aesthetic sense of fashion and had a happy time doing so, the last weekend. Since Parveen and Aafia are back to India by this tuesday, they came with us too and we had a total blast!
First time in my adult life I feel like I look good [my fruitless attempts at losing weight aside] and people agree with me [isn't that a first ever occurrence of that or what?]
Just when we thought things will settle down now, I had a very uncomfortable last week with farewells everyday [after which people looked continually surprised to see me haunting the corridors, as if I was some undead creature]. I have been parroting to everyone I see that I will continue in my cube until the end of the first week of September when I actually leave.
After jubilantly surviving the "Official" last day, when I was just walking home last night I managed to keep my life eventful by inadvertently spraining my ankle but twisting it, might I add - powerfully.

As a result my plans to quench my thirst for knowledge at the Carnegie Museum of Natural History and Art were fizzled out and I had to end up apologising to the 2 kind souls who had agreed to accompany me in the first place - Srividya and Vicky.

So I am now getting used to being waited on and being handed my food and anything else I would like ;)
It also helps that my friends are calling in every part of the day - morning, afternoon, evening and night to check on my condition, making me feel really cherished. Only furrow in my happy face is the worry that my ankle might not heal in time for my first day in the new project - Monday or further that it might remain weak during my much awaited, long anticipated, most carefully planned vacation to the Grand Canyon [woo hooooo!]

Having so much free time and restricted movement, my thoughts turn to the 2 movies I have seen recently - My Sassy Girl [Thanks to the persistent effects of SriVidya] and Kanda Naal Mudhal [Which I have seen so many times, I can't count]
The Girl being naturally more dominant than the Boy, slapping the guy is common to both. Needless to say, I enjoyed it as a variation of the usual, man slapping some sense to the girl approach that works so wonderfully in the Indian Movies [Stereotypically, of course].

The count down to my GrandCanyon trip, the NY Move and the India vacation is a constant ticker in my mind :D [Yaaaaaaaaaaaay] and it gets me through the day.

Upbeat despite the swollen ankle [or is it too much icecream?]
Rain