Yesterday was DG’s [devil-guy] birthday, and I wished him today. He supposedly confirmed with his mother and let me know how wrong I was chronologically. I think his actual mother was a jackal; I do remember the story of Omen.
But ‘dread fascination’ is as old a characteristic of a human as dreams. You deeply dislike something but you enjoy mentions of it. Makes life interesting. Why else would people be interested in Bikers, Witches and Devil-worshippers? Me- I enjoy any tit-bits I get about anything even remotely mysterious or evil. I am really hopeless about this. So I like keeping in touch with DG. I have Pumpkin to thank for the great clarification he provided in my mind with respect to DG.
So my liking for forbidden subjects leads most people to believe I am very vile, while on the contrary I am quite a purist. But V, the eternal questioner has asked me many times, ‘would you judge people who date or marry inappropriately?’
‘ Would you dislike me if I married a younger guy or a much older man?’.
I am very much against me doing any of these things and will even try to talk her out if she considers them, but ultimately I will stand by any decision my friend chooses to make.
Truth is, I can’t dislike V or Pumpkin even if they harm me wantonly, as one has done already. I will always remember them even if they choose to break off contact.
The conflicts that deep affection brings are myriad and all painful.
But these are my feelings and I will acknowledge them. My sister has tried to convince me to forget old friendships that did not work out, quite unsuccessfully I must say. I have to admit that I even wanted to try , then I realized there is no way I can actual achieve that. There are a million things that will remind me anyway. So many things bring 2 people as friends and when they are apart, the very same things let them know that they don’t have that precious friend anymore.
Rain
PS: In my defense, I was running a high fever when I wrote this. I am anything but sentimental.
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